514 Outfit Post – Easter Monday & What Women Want
(What I’m Wearing – Forever 21 chain tank, Marciano jacket, don’t remember where I got the earrings… cheapies though…)
Happy Easter y’all!
Spring has been putting up a fight here in the 514, and apparently so am I!
I don’t know if it’s the seasonal change, a boost in hormone ridiculosity or just bitchville season, but I am fully charged and on the loose. Snapping, retracting from the babe (and public places in general), and rapidly entering hermit mode… I am far from being at my best. While I like to apply the saying “If they can’t handle you at your worst, they sure as hell don’t deserve you at your best”, I can easily see the other side of the fury – torture for those you surround yourself with. Sometimes I just wish others would pay a little more attention to others “personal bubbles” if you will. Button pushers who don’t know the limits of when it’s okay to tease and just stop cold turkey (in fear for their lives).
Vlad seems to think I’ve turned all diva on his ass… presuming my ego has inflated to the roof… yeah. Okay.
Can a girl not seriously PMS once in a blue moon (I am a pretty good sport for the most part, if you exclude the laughing that turns to crying hysteria spells during that special monthly week)? Is it some sick joke that God didn’t equip men to disarm situations like these? Maybe misunderstanding comes hand in hand with long term relationships, or perhaps men really are from Mars while women enjoy the non-existant sun on Venus… in any case, why can’t we all just get along? And no, women “behaving” normally is not a resolution. How the hell do you expect us to function properly when are bodies are giving us the middle finger on a monthly basis? We feel emotions on a maternal level (aka retardation sensitive), so boys, do you mind cutting us a little slack (and no, not just this once)?
I’ve prepared a little list of “What Women Want” – and not just when times are tough (ladies, hand over the laptop to your man)…
- Listen. Sometimes, everything feels hard. If you can believe it, there are days when just getting dressed and fed proves to be a challenge that can end in tears. We know you think we’re crazy when we come to you venting about how we burnt every single piece of toast (that of course was the toasters fault), and end up in a heap over not being able to get enough toothpaste out of the last tube – but being there for us and listening is one of the biggest comforts you can offer a girl. If you really wanna turn that frown upside down, then go the extra mile and lend your (fake) understanding (in a sincere, believable way – otherwise you’re dead meat!). Steer clear of trying to make light of the situation with jokes… high chances that this will backfire badly!
- Back off with the sexuality – we want sensuality! Look, there are times and places for everything. I can tell you first hand that when I am in physical pain alongside feeling nauseous and get pestered for lovin’ (with no effort or seduction whatsoever), a certain rage takes over me. Boys, it’s not that we don’t want to be close – it’s that when you ignore the well being of someone you love and prioritize your own needs instead of reaching a common consideration, yes you’re gonna piss us off. There is nothing sexier than a man who will take care of his woman when she is feeling down… playing with her hair, rubbing her stomach, telling her stories to take her mind off her worries – spending time being intimate rather than rushing into anything. Play the patience card and you will get further than you think.
- Simple pleasures & extra TLC please. As hard as it is to avoid, the worst thing you can do when a woman is going emotionally nuts is be confrontational and bring seriously offensive shit into the mix. You may feel like you are defending your grounds, but in many ways you are just causing irrevocable damage to your relationship without good reason. These are times when you try your best to steer clear of the drama and picking fights and disarm bombs via good deeds. Run her a bubble bath, prepare her favourite sandwich, leave a love note in her pockets or purse… whatever you can that allows you a bit of distance when she is looking for trouble, and praise when she finally finds your sweet gesture (which will hopefully aid with the mood swings)!
- Do the romantic fluff. Be her prince charming. It’s a tall order, I know. Little girls (whether they apply it to their grown up lives or not), all want to find their saviour who will capture their heart, their senses and their ideals. Tap into her dreams and girlish fantasies and play them up. Sure, you may feel like an idiot, but romance is what strengthens attraction and makes the walls come tumbling down. Take one for the team and keep your dream girl by allowing her to live out hers.
- Spend time. Never allow for disconnect. Long term relationships are hard. A lot of work, maintenance, and dedication is involved. One of the most common things that happens is that couples get too comfortable being together, and let the everyday mundane drown out their time and lust-building together. The point of being together is to be there for each other and provide anchors for both of your trials and tribulations. Don’t carry on independently when you’re counterpart is sinking. Keep it exciting, do the unexpected, break the mould – time and time again.
- Make us feel irreplaceable. There may be millions of gorgeous girls lined up and ready to date you (heck, they may even be multiple times more successful, beautiful and intelligent than anything we could ever come close to), but hearing your enthusiasm/interest towards them is not something that will win over our loyalty (or make us more competitive – you will just be left high and dry). Rihanna said it best – make us feel like we are the only girl in the world. Nobodies perfect in reality – we should be in your eyes though. Prop us up on that pedestal we all love perching on so much.
- Protect us. I know, it’s 2011 and we are all fiercely independent women trailblazing and taking it to the top amongst our fellow males. Doesn’t mean we aren’t still ladies who like to be treated as such. Just because we can take care of ourselves doesn’t mean you’re off the hook! When someone talks down or rudely to your lady – defend us (in a polite way of course, no fist fights por favor)! Just because we know how to use our claws doesn’t mean you can’t jump in and play the gentleman card. We are amongst the strongest on the inside, but sometimes we just don’t want the toxic of everyday life and bitter people infecting the positive vibes we’ve worked so hard to protect day in and out. Regard us as exotic flowers that you want to see blossom to the extent of their beauty.
(What He’s Wearing – Gucci Red Aviators, Rudsak jacket, white leather Converse)
- Allow us freedom. We are not beautiful specimens to be placed in a glass box and preserved for your sole enjoyment. We understand your concern when we are out late without you and haven’t checked in, but the worst thing a man can be is possessive in an intolerable way. We are not possessions to be owned and captured. We do not belong to you – we belong to ourselves. We love you and choose to give our everything to you, so don’t get it twisted aight? Enough with the calling and pouring on the guilt, accusing us of being out with other guys and embarrassing us in front of our friends when you decide to play the 21 questions game at the other end of the line. If you are taking care of your woman the way you should be, then trust should never be an issue and none of these bad manners have any reason to be exercised. Got it? Good.
- Empower us. Very few dudes out there can handle a woman who is as or more successful as they are (truly). While they put on a happy face, behind the cool front many guys get incredibly intimidated. Men of the world – push your woman forward, don’t make her feel bad for trying to get ahead and follow her dreams! Understand that not every dame is satisfied with just being your wife, and allow her to pursue her goals in this life (trust me, allowing your significant other to gain purpose and satisfaction from something they can control will only lighten your load when it comes to emotional dependancy and happiness). Egg each other on… who knows, you just might become an unbeatable power duo!
- Be proud of us. Tell and show us that when you walk beside us on street, that you think we are incredible (I know, I know… by now this is sounding like a helluva lot of praise from your end right?). Promote us when we are too humble to, get excited with us when big things happen in our favour. Be the guy who walks hand in hand with the lady he loves (and it’s written all over his face), while paying no mind to the sexy gazelle that just strode past…
Now play nice boys and girls.
P.S. Like the fashion illustration I am still working on? Almost done (tomorrow)!Posted under 514 Outfit Post, artwork, makeup, My Makeup by Robyn