Wave Of Fatigue & Hanging In There

Wave Of Fatigue & Hanging In There

Just as any calm after stormy weather takes the worst to see it over and through, these last few days have been trying.  All of a sudden the fatigue I first experienced in my first trimester are back, alongside an increased pressure in my pelvis.  I’ve gained 27 pounds to date, and am starting to really feel the extra weight.

Out of nowhere, and seemingly all of a sudden, a plethora of insecurities, fears, and worries has plagued my mind.  I don’t know if it’s because I’m too drained to think straight at the moment, or if they actually hold real merit – but browsing baby store sections lately has me feeling rather unprepared for everything.  It’s possible that my natural hoarding instincts are rebelling from not having everything ready and set up for bebe already.  Patience and hormones just don’t mix.  Neither does marketing and vulnerable maternal instinct.

In any case, until I’ve gotten more sleep, I’m going to write off my woes as temporary disillusionment (I hear these concerns are completely normal when you’re preggo).  Noticing a lot of changes over the course of the past few days, I think this little one might be arriving earlier than expected (not prematurely, just slightly more punctual than his due date predicts).  With my ever-increasing hospital worries looming, I’ll also be looking into hiring a midwife for the birth.  If I can do it safely at home in the tub, that’s where I want to be.

Without rambling further, it’s time to sign off for the day and tackle my remaining tasks with the little energy I have to spare!

Have a beautiful, early night (I know I will),

xox

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