Self Love Exploration & Teambuy.ca Giveaway

In light of the passing of Valentine’s day, and for the first time in a long time confronting it sans-man on this couple’s holiday – it’s time to shed some light on the art that is self-love (something that is VITAL – single or attached).

I won’t lie and tell you I’ve figured it all out – in many ways I feel as though this genuine journey has only just started for me.  You see, for a long time I had it all mixed up… knowing your worth is spoiling yourself right?  Well, yes… but most probably not in the ways you’re thinking.  Self love goes tremendously further than surrounding yourself with positive people and splurging on your every whim (whatever your vice may be).  It’s about protecting your mind and body, avoiding vulnerably harmful situations, respecting your values and morals, accepting your faults as your own perfections.  It’s about knowing when to draw the line when it’s been crossed, about not allowing yourself to fall victim to others who put you down or belittle your personal choices and preferences.  There is no excuse for insult – EVER (even when you feel like others aren’t hearing you – emphasizing your point this way will only reveal your immaturity while stripping you of credibility and poise).  Self love is a lot about not taking other peoples shit while keeping your own class and composure (you aren’t doing yourself any favours by seriously considering all-encompassing negativity and slander).  Self love is as much cutting yourself slack as it is instilling discipline for your overall benefit.  Self love is knowing your worth (something I can be a bit shady on).  Self love is the ability to be selfless.  Self love is wanting the best for yourself – regardless of your surroundings and circumstance.

The thing a lot of us don’t realize (mostly because I believe there to be way too many distractions luring us in the wrong directions), is that you NEED nobody.  You need love, absolutely.  I think that there is nothing more valuable and absolute than a safe, honest, loyal and loving family – not everyone is so lucky though (something I thank god for every night before I go to sleep – it’s actually quite incredible how my spirituality seems to be at an all-time high these days).  I would never go so far as to say that people are replaceable – because they aren’t at all.  Everyone is special, unique and deserves only love and happiness (regardless of their character and natural tendencies).  Some people however, mixed with others, create bad reactions and unfavourable results.  As much as I believe in true romantically spontaneous love and friendship, if another person is only there for you part of the time, or contradicts their real feelings and cares for you through words or actions, they are most likely doing more damage than good (and same goes for them with you!).  Great chemistry, love, similarities, and understanding fundamentals just aren’t enough if acceptance and respect is lacking.  Remember: no one is forcing you to be with someone (be it a friend or lover) – you are only held back or pushed forward by your own allowance.  You can leave at any time (regardless of the baggage, so long as it’s done responsibly).  There is no written rule implying you’ve got to wait out a set amount of misery before you get a taste of the sunshine.  Wherever you are, whoever you are with – you should WANT to be there on your own terms (when you don’t, you should still understand why you’re doing it).  Self love is being able to stand on your own, no matter what tries to tear you down or challenge your core.

(What I’m Wearing – V Franz design)

Madonna said it best…

“Power is being told you are not loved, and not being destroyed by it.”

It is a fact of life that some people will love you, and others will hate you – get used to it and only change if it means an amelioration for the better.

Over the past nine years (with a two year gap in between there), I have lived within relationships.  While growing drastically alongside (and from) the partners I was with, there really wasn’t much development purely from my end (then again that is probably a great thing – without their support and belief in me, who knows where I’d be).  I learnt SO much.  While I still probably don’t play fair in a relationship (I admit to being a total princess), I get closer to realizing the impact of my actions on someone I love.  I also realize that I gave something invaluable of my own to them – little things of which I’ll probably never truly know – from different perspectives to lifestyle habits (probably bad, if I’m totally honest)… maybe even a different way to love.  Everyone has something to offer, and sometimes we cross paths with people who lend a shining light to the direction we need to be going.  There is no such thing as a temporary passing in my minds eye, instead a purpose that aligns with timing and place.  At the end of the day, you have to please you.  Once you’ve mastered that, then feel free to hand some of it over.  It’s easy to get lost in compromise, something I’m a big believer in.  We get so consumed in doing the right thing for the people we want in our lives that we sometimes (desperately) allow it to override our own path.  Stick to your guns and always know that your gut feeling is right (ladies listen up – we are especially good at ignoring the red flags of life through a benefit-of-the-doubt mentality).

It seems as though the more and more successful we become in our North American mindset, the more we lose focus of our primal values – family, health, security, and spending time.  Our focus has shifted to quick fixes – inevitably resulting in a shallow, unsatisfied vision of ourselves.  The more we have, the unhappier we get.  The unhappier we are, the more we want more.  It’s an ever-faltering circle that leads to an nonconstructive/productive dead end.  It’s a shame, and it’s a waste.  People’s actions, morals, and thought processes then change to reflect and protect these new ideals – leaving paranoia and distrust in its primary aftermath (and for good reason).  You feel lost.  You feel little.  It is in this very moment where we need to find a solution within ourselves.  We need to stop these accepted patterns and break our own moulds so that we can finally win back the love we lost for ourselves.  The love that we can sadly no longer count on attaining from someone else.  YOU must be your own biggest fan.  I honestly believe it may be the only thing that will enable you to get through life in one piece (while smiling of course).

On a completely unrelated note, this week I’ve been exceedingly exhausted naturally.  I don’t know if it’s because I had a field day on Valentine’s with the macaron and coffee consumption (something my cleanse seriously does not allow), but my body is retaliating in a big way.  I’m thirsty all the time no matter how much water or tea I drink, I’m unable to be productive apart from keeping my apartment relatively clean, I’m breaking out ferociously (my skin is mad, mad, mad), and my bacon consumption is at an all-time high… thoughts?  I slept all day today.  It was pretty ridiculous!  Of course I woke up early to check out the opening of the new Tiffany’s store on Sherbrooke and De la Montagne (I can now have breakfast at Tiffany’s every time I leave my place!), which by the way has a gorgeous assortment of diamond rings, handbags and travel tags, watches and key charms (amongst the other silver beauties we have all come to know and love).  To top it all off with a turquoise cherry, the gift bag for guests was a gorgeous charm necklace (I don’t plan on taking it off anytime soon it’s so perfect).  Other events I kept up with this week were the DIA haircolor event at L’Oreal’s head office (to which I was treated full on to a roots touch up, ashed-out toner, and Photo Gloss treatment (gives crazy shine for up to eight washes – I’m completely smitten with my finally silver locks!), the A is for Aldo fragrance launch (turns out I have a thing for wanting to wear mens cologne), alongside a look into what’s happening for Spring/Summer 2012 at GAP, Old Navy, and Banana Republic (in a house that as beautiful as it was, scared the life out of me with it’s bridge-like stairs).

Events are cool because you get to try and see things before they are launched – but I don’t know how people keep up with them all while getting any work done!

Coming up this week (you can catch my updates on twitter)…

• A special dinner with 20 of Montreal’s most influential figures (Monday)
• Acting a small part in Ralph Leroy’s feature film
• A look at the new collection of Converse sneakers at Candi Bar (Wednesday)
• Roger & Gallet are launching a new scent!  I wonder what it will be… (Wednesday)
• Student of the Down 101 class (I’ll be an expert in the differences of goose feathers and duvets, winter jackets and insulating materials) (Thursday)
• Samuel Mercure will show his fall/winter 2012 collection – can’t wait (Thursday)
• Off to Christian L’Enfant Roi for the fall/winter presentation of his latest collection (Friday)
• It’s off to Quebec City for the Fashion Jam!  Fashion shows and chilling with the Olympic snowboarding team is getting me tres excited!  Can’t wait for the train ride and overnight stay in style… (Saturday)

*phew*

(What I’m Wearing – La Senza strapless bra, Hanky Panky lace thong, Woolford opaque tights, Zara studded booties)

I’m also looking forward to some outings I planned for myself via the generosity of Teambuy!  They lavishly reached out to me offering $250 to shop their site (where you can get outstanding limited deals on everything from travel, food, spa packages, and items themselves), to distract myself from the winter “blahs” (we all know February is the worst month to play the springtime waiting game).

What did I buy?

• 2 x Orange Spa packages on Drummond including a one hour massage, hand or foot exfoliation, access to their Nordic Terrace and tea bar ($300 value)
• 2 x 3 hours of professional home cleaning by Maids To Die For ($200 value)
• 2 x Tasting menu for two at La Mediterranee restaurant on De la Montagne ($288 value)

(What I’m Wearing – Bebe lace chinoiserie dress)

Have a beautiful weekend – working on getting these posts back to consistent!

xox

collections events fashion in montreal self love V Franz Posted under 514 Outfit Post, designer, fashion, montreal, My thoughts exactly..., Uncategorized by Robyn